High winds from Hurricane Katie have forced the closure of most roads into Harefield. The only road open is Harvil Road which is shut due to railway bridge repairs. Drivers traveling down Church Hill are advised to proceed with caution as strong winds are getting behind vehicles and blowing them through the speed cameras at excessive speeds. 

The 347 double decker bus service has been suspended and only the single decker 309 is able to run a shuttle from the High Street to round Ash Grove. Cyclists are advised to take extra care, especially elderly wizards on penny farthings. 

Springwell Lane is closed by the Mink Farm where a tractor towing a trailer full of mattresses and hardcore overturned. High sided vehicles are prohibited from Park Lane after a beer delivery lorry  carrying vital supplies of Old Bedwetter to the Coy Crap was blown sideways into a garden on the corner of Barrington Drive that has been shored up by scaffolding since last year’s Hurricane Janet. 

The Costcutters in the High Street is limiting sales of Stella to one crate per person until normal deliveries resume or supplies run out. Good news though, Rameshes Revenge and 24 Hour Convenience Store in Nothing Rhymed Road on the Gilbert O’Sullivan estate is selling Stella at six pounds for eight cans, Easter Monday only. 

Water levels have risen considerably in the last few hours. The pond has flooded the entire common and the park in South Harefield is under two feet of water. Keep fit enthusiasts attending the Get-U-Fit classes are not to be put off though, waders are supplied for the most determined and water aerobics are the order of the day. 

Young mothers with children on school holidays are worrying about how to keep their youngsters amused. The popular website harefieldmumsnet.com has received so much traffic it has crashed. User cherylsweettits92 posted ‘ i don no wot to do wiv britney she is bord wiv easter eggs an her farver sed he wud take her out but he didnt cum cos he sez he has no money but i no he has cos he bort his new bird an iPhone 6 an she has four kids of her own an she works in the chiltern view and is on benyfits’. 

The forecast for the rest of the week is fair and drivers are advised to make unnecessary journeys then. 

  
  
The never-say-die spirit is alive and well in Harefield.